normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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