Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
last night I used snow as a chaser
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize