It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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