I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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