i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Randomize
