your parents love me but you hate me
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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