I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize