You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
