Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
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