we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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