The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Randomize