what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
