dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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