He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Randomize
