Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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