i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.