he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
