singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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