he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
