You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
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And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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