What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Randomize
