Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
soo... how was my night?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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