It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
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Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
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Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
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