So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
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He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
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A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
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