i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
