i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Randomize
