Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
i think i have herpe
just one?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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