sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize
