Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Just high enough for therapy.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
