Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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