Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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