He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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