Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
Randomize
