who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
