I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
