remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
