Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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