I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize