All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
well you can't waste a boner
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
