Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize