awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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