I think scott just propositioned me for sex
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
