i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
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