If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
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