I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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