Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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