I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
