is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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