You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
