you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize
